I miss my son. I miss his sunshine smile and his laugh. I miss how he used to answer "I love you more" every time I told him I loved him. I miss taking him to the movies and sharing a box of Junior Mints. I even miss covering his eyes for him during the scary movie trailers.
For the last few days he has been lying in bed. He doesn't want to eat or drink. He doesn't even really want to watch television. Several hours ago I put a can of Pepsi next to his bed and he hasn't even touched it.
While we are working with his doctor to adjust his meds, we feel very helpless and even discouraged.
Kellen, I know you are in there somewhere. Please, for your mom, come back soon.
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6 comments:
Jodi, I've been enjoying your blog for months, so even though I don't know you and Kellen I feel like I do. I hope Kellen comes around soon to a happier place. It must be very hard.
I echo Clare's sentiments. My heart goes out to you all.
Suz in Canada
Come back Kellen so you Mom can share the wonderful stories she has of your antics. Jodi, I'm sorry that you and hubby are going through this. I really hope that whatever is making Kellen so depressed is resolved soon. Let him know that we are thinking of him.
L,
Jacqui
Oh, this must be heartbreaking to watch. Hoping things turn around for Kellen and for you soon.
Does Kellen still want to snuggle with his cat?
You could be the voice of the cat, asking Kellen to come back. That would be funny and cheering to Kellen and to your readership as well. I can just imagine the purry voice, the contralto "Come back, Kellen" with a rising note-meow at the end.
Seriously, I would be depressed if my kid was depressed. You must be asking "How can my son be so sad, when he is sl loved and appreciated?" Jodi, you MUST know that it nothing that you did or didn't do within your family . . . depression has a life of its own.
I have been there---I know how that goes.
Chris and Vic
Yes, the constant through this all is wanting Max to cuddle with. Unfortunately, Max usually only wants to come home around dinner time. You are right, having depression in the house is highly contagioius! I once read an article on that while sitting in the waiting room of the psychiatrist office.
This anxiety and depression seems to be so related to his hormones and body chemistry....so only in a very weak moment do I start to question what we're doing/not doing. The good news is that he is doing better every day. Yesterday he was able to leave the house twice! He stayed in the car, but still, this is major progress.
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